jokerdude

We all enjoy talking about our successes and our accomplishments, but what about our failures? It is not always easy to admit failure especially when you do a working and you get excited about the outcome will be only to eventually realize, you got something wrong along the way.

Below I present to you, some of my failures. Why? Hopefully to get constructive criticism, feedback and on one particular experiment, perhaps generate interest in a re-do of a group working from the first CMG group.

Eligos

Eligos

The first time I ever attempted to use goetic evocation, I choose the spirit Eligos after researching spirits well suited for business and sales endeavors. I used the conjure tech found here at the Queen Of Pentacles Conjure Blog.

I took some minor liberties with this technique which may have lead to problems that arose although, I have tried a BUNE evocation with the same process and being more stringent with following the instructions that also failed…

When failing with BUNE however, he either did not show up or did not comply. Eligos on the other hand, clearly just does not like triangles and made it a point to show his displeasure by atempting to break bones in my left toes…

Let me explain…

On that fateful evening I set up the triangle as mentioned above as a friend of my wife and I stopped by to make us a vegetarian dish for dinner. The meal to be prepared was spaghetti squash with vegetable marinara.

After lighting the candles I sat down to read and could feel a very noticeable electrical buzz near the triangle. A few moments later, our friend asked for assistance cutting the squash in half. If you have never made this squash before, I will advise you to take caution as it is very hard on the outside when un-ripe, which is why our friend wanted assistance.

I placed the squash on the counter and attempted to cut it with a large knife. I found that it was to hard to do this with one hand so, I placed my other hand on the opposite top side of the blade and pushed down as hard as I possible could, trying to split the awkward root vegetable in half.

The squash then proceeded to fly off the counter straight down to the floor at a very rapid pace and then subsequently slammed down onto the big toe of my left foot with a force that felt like a cannonball.

OUCH! I yelled appropriately.

My wife and my friend rushed to my aid thinking I may have cut myself which thankfully, I had not. After assuring them I was ok and laughing at my own foolishness, hobbled across the kitchen to get the runaway gourd.

Replacing it on the counter and taking a new and slower approach, I was able to cut the damn thing in half after which, my friend took over with the meal preparations as I hobbled into the living room, bringing a large bottle of wine with me.

I quickly drank a couple glasses to aid with the pain that had started to be more than a little noticeable which helped for about 15 minutes before the pain began to get increasingly bad. After another 20 minutes I was in shock at how much my toe hurt, I began to think that perhaps I broke it…

I drank more wine but the alcohol had no effect and after another few minutes pondering how ridiculous I was going to look in the ER explaining this story, I decide to swallow my pride and ask my wife for a ride to the hospital which thankfully for me, is less than a mile from where I live.

After putting one on one shoe and preparing to leave, I had planned on letting the candles burn out while my friend stayed behind however when walking over to where the conjure device was set up, I tripped and knocked all the candles over, spilling wax all over the place and snuffing out the flames.

As soon as that happened, the pain in my left toe decreased by almost 50%.

Let’s just say I have never attempted to work with Eligos via said technique again and have no plans of ever doing so…

“The Not So Great Gufaw”

hahaha

In July of 2014, I formed a private facebook group for a group working in the original CMG (my facebook name at the time was Dubious Monk). The name of the group shared the name of the working I had in mind which was called “The Great Gufaw”. Myself and 11 other members of the CMG each did some form of magic focused on the same goal.

The goal, was to make Pat Robertson Guffaw on live television…

Basically, I envisioned him randomly bursting into uncontrollable laughter, spit and snot flying all over his befuddled co-host and the show cutting to a “please stand by” message.

Either the magic is taking a very long time to work, or it was a failure. My guess is that as Pat has literally millions of “prayer warriors” praying for him at all hours of the day and being that prayer is a powerful form of sympathetic magic in and of itself, chances are, the working was deflected.

This is a project I would very much like to revisit with a larger group of magicians for another run through.

DISCLAIMER: There was NEVER, nor is there ANY intention of causing harm to Pat. He’s used his words and influence to cause enough heartache and pain in the world. The intention of this working would be to cause a “jovial” burst of laughter and joy in the spirit of the say, the merry pranksters.

Honestly who doesn’t think Pat needs to lighten up a bit?

Spirit Contracts

This was an attempt at a very mundane approach to spirit evocation where I used a contract from my sales position at my company as a template to literally “do business” with a spirit.

The contract as seen below, was printed onto a paper via a laser printer. I signed it and burned it as some might do with an AOS style sigil.

contract

Nothing happened, which in consideration of the fact that I was experimenting with Eligos again, is actually quite a relief. I will gladly take disinterest and being ignored over a metaphysical punch in the foot any day…

This technique also failed with BUNE.

So, what are some of your failures? What did you gain from the process despite not finding success and what knowledge and wisdom did you take from the experience to bring to future work?

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